|
|
:: 12.04.2002 ::
No, you won't. It is terribly disheartening to find that during the days that I was seeing my friends (those of you loyal enough to be reading up on me, ever) the hits on my blog grew not-at-all. I feel like there is no point in even writing. These are the throes of blog-suicide - I see no reason to go on, especially since it is looking like these next few weeks will be chok-full of stuff-to-do, then I go on Holiday, then I leave for the West Coast where I more than likely will not have this Internet from my home. So, is it worth the hassle of updating for the reading pleasure of 6 people a day. I feel like: if people are going to read this, then it is more than worth it to me to update it as regularly as I possibly can, even if that means writing from work. But if no one is going to read this, then fuck it, I'm only wasting my time (which I have little of to begin with) and so much cyberspace that could be filled with that much more porn and pop-ups.
I enjoy reading other blogs, even random ones, so I'm not opposed to the whole system. This was supposed to be my "crowning glory in the bog world" but no one seems to be listening.
While there is no good in speaking quietly in a noisy forum, maybe there is no harm in it. Maybe this will continue. For now, the debate returns to inside my head...
"I'm so sick and tired of all the things you do to me, say nothing new to me, you do as you please. I having a hard time with these things you bring to me (like I'm guilty or something) whatever you're trying to say..."
:: Freddy F. at 10:35 AM [+] ::
::
(0) comments
::
:: 11.26.2002 ::
Going on holiday for a while, which means, you won't get anything new here. Will you notice...
"Seein' red. Don't think you'll be seein' me around. I think it's time to make a choice..."
:: Freddy F. at 10:45 AM [+] ::
::
(0) comments
::
:: 11.25.2002 ::
So I've got another new approach: not blogging. Man, it was a crazy last week. Many hours in studio, many days where studiotime outnumbered sleeptime almost five to one. But that's fine, because now it is all down time for the next 24+ hours. And here I sit at my computer, swilling on a bottle of Manischewitz, trying to remember what I wanted to blog about the last week. I don't remember, not because I'm drunk, but because there have been a lot of little brian cells that have committed suicide in the battles that have ensued in the last ten days. It probably doesn't matter much because 95% of the people who read this blog, who would care about those stories, will be where I am in 24 hours (when I get home on Tuesday), i.e. The Fox and the Hound.
So have a good Thanksgiving, please remember to count your blessings and be thankful that you are someone who has blessings to count. And if you don't have blessings, then I wish you the best in the coming "holiday" season and good luck. I wish the world was a much more peaceful place and I wish people (myself included) had a little more tolerance for one another. But I do have hope...
:: Freddy F. at 9:03 PM [+] ::
::
(0) comments
::
:: 11.18.2002 ::
I am trying a bit of a different approach here, I will not be blogging at work, thus saving myself the guilt that I feel after charging the state $22.75 each day for sitting there and doing nothing. So today I went in thinking, "Alright, I'm really going to work, I'm going to do as much as I possibly can without my boss's approval, and that should be a lot of work." I worked hard from 8 until 9.3o before realizing that I was completely out of work. And now comes the true test: Boss will be out of town for the next three days - will the work hold up, or will I collapse into my world of Spider Solitaire and blogging? I must fight to stay focused... focused like a ninja.
After reading several articles about Iraq and the [potentially] ensuing "war" I had the following thought that could be possibly construed as insightful: As a nation there is a battle to protect the right for individuals to own weapons of death, and as a world there is a battle to deny the right for nations to own weapons of death. It is the same battle, but on a different scale. The "ironic" part of this is that at either scale, one nation is fighting on the opposite sides of the other scale. How very strange that on the national level they promote weapons as a means of deterence and on the world level they promote weapons only as a threat.
Without any desire to knock on any single blog out there [because there are so many good ones] I'd have to say that I am finding the most enjoyment from reading this one, because it's long [like mine], and because it is very much along the lines of how I was feeling at that point in my life. I mean, who doesn't have the memory of coming back to the dorm freshman year, only to find their roommate violently ill from hitting vodka shots all night long. I remember that from my freshman year. And my sophomore year. And my junior year. Fuckers.
And last, but most definietly not least, I'd like to thank this good friend [Mr. Three-links-in-one-entry] for remembering my November 15th "birthday" and delivering an excellent mix-CD for my listening enjoyment. The title, so apropro. The songs, so fine. The format, working for me. But hey "I ain't happy, I'm feelin glad..."
"When I get to the bottom, I go back to the top of the slide..."
:: Freddy F. at 8:10 PM [+] ::
::
(0) comments
::
:: 11.15.2002 ::
This week has indeed been a taxing one. Too much due and, I admit, it got the best of me - I blew up at some people that I shouldn't have and made some unnecessary comments and for that I would like to apologize (don't worry, I have apologized to them personally as well, I'm just filling you in on the gist of it). "All work and no play, makes Jack a dull boy." So, it seems like a need a little play time. Not yet, but soon, just need to wrap up some odds and ends. But, I thought I have some valid points, that I will try to summarize here for my thoughts on the week.
Isuue One: Personal Responsibility
If you don't like something change it. If it can't be changed, fight it. If you don't want to fight it, don't complain about it. Each of us is responsible for our station in life - we are sentient beings and can move at will. If things are not as you want them to be, you must fix them or change your goals. Do not blame others for your station, because you have the power to change it. I know that I am not the best motivational speaker, know one will nominate me for any Knute Rockne awards, but the only one who will drag you out of your rut, is you.
Furthermore, when something has been done, remember the old (albeit nearly loathsome) adage: If you are pointing the finger at someone, there are three pointing back at you." If you screwed up a test, don't blame the teacher for teaching poorly or the lack of study time; buck up and take a better test next time. If the project didn't turn out the way you wanted it to, either fix it, or remember what was done and do it differently next time. If someone is mad at you for something, analyze the situation - have you done something wrong, if yes, then apologize or at least don't blame the person for being upset. And I know I am not exempt from this sin - I too, carry a cross from an old friendship, adn maybe some simple words of kindness would be enough to pave over that fault. I haven't done it yet because I don't believe that I am strong enough, but I hope that before I leave this region I will have taken steps to rectify this situtation.
Issue Two: Rumors
There was a time when I said "Everyone talks about everyone else, because there is nothing else to talk about, so get used to it." A wise friend (who I would gladly link to if she had a blog of her own) felt that I was incorrect and that we could think of lots of other things. At the time I thought she was wrong, but now I want her to be right. Anymore, my conversations consist of "he said, she said," "he's doing, she's doing," and I honestly think it breeds disgust. I don't know how much of a "libertarian" someone could consider me, but I firmly agree with Walt Whitman that "everyone should be allowed to go to hell anyway he chooses." If this person is doing that, unless whatever their doing is going to roll over my toes, I don't need to hear about it. It feels like conversations ahve just become a bunch of tattle-tales. I miss conversations of politics, ideas, landscape theory and principle, and even sports. I find myself longing to hear the words "I think" rather than "Didja hear" I imagine that I fall victim to this as well, but I'd like to think that I try not to spread rumors and gossip, and focus on the more important things.
Issue Three: Intent
Do not judge me, because you do not know my intent. Don't assume, don't go on what you heard from friends, don't belive what everyone tells you. Use the ol' noggin or if that is too much, come ask me, I'm an honest guy, I won't lie to you. If what I am doing is hurting you, then tell me, don't just assume that I am doing it to spite you. It is a rare time that I want to hurt someone, so don't think you are so lucky to be the one I hurt. Don't martyr yourself for me, I've asked for none. Be honest with me, and understand that I will be nothing but honest with you.
And somewhat related, don't play the politics. Please, do not be the bat - favoring both parties until there is a decisive winner, and don't play the Nazi, being kind to my face but amassing forces against me behind the curtain. I will not respond well to deception, and I don't like being "played." I wear my emotions on my sleeve and I never apologize for that.
I'm worried that this is going to come out sounding like I'm whining or someone is gong to be upset by this. No, I'm not worried about that at all. I'm worried that people will read this and think I'm taking cheap shots at them and will thus, misinterpret what I'm saying. I think it all boils down to taking control over your own situation and being an honest person. These are the things I ask for in the people around me. I admit, it is probably not good of me to start demanding things of the people around me, I have no right to that, if I'm unhappy then I should just "take control of myself" adn get the fuck out. And I will if it somes to that. Now, I'm here, finishing a degree that will hopefully take me to the places (geogrpahically) that I want to be. And when I go, I hope I can take the people (both literally and figurativly) that I enjoy being around.
I ran out of time when I first posed this because I was at work, then I got busy with stuff, then I had to end it quick so I could make it to class ontime. There is only one thing that I wanted to say. Does the picture at the bottom of today's entry of Bob Borden look a lot like a drawing that this guy would have done? Way to go national with the art, my friend (if that is the case).
So that's it, everything is going fine now, looking forward to a peaceful weekend.
"Don't be fooled the rocks that I got. I'm still (I'm still) Jenny from the block..."
:: Freddy F. at 12:29 PM [+] ::
::
(0) comments
::
:: 11.13.2002 ::
There goes my motivation, right out the window...
There is nothing quite like a beautiful afternoon, when you're feeling quite good about thinking you have accomplished a lot. It seems like Monday was so long ago, when I had tons and tons to do, and Friday and the weekend are so far away, and sure, I'll be able to get everything done before then, no sweat, and I have done so much since Monday, don't I deserve a break. But I look back, and have I really accomplished that much - could I have done a few more things and slept a little less... Could I have gotten that stuff wrapped up if I hadn't been playing BeJeweled for the last half hour... It get's to be so maddening to keep trying to stay on top, sometimes I envy those who are way behind. I want to pace myself, don't pull all-nighters until I have to, but then you run the risk of waiting too long and turning in shit. Does everyone else out there deal with this too, or is it just me?
I won't lie, I can't wait.
If I don't do it now, I won't get started until 7 tonight, so I'd best be getting to work.
Play fair...
"Lost the battle, lost the war, lost the things worth living for. Lost the will to win the fight, one more pill to kill the pain..."
:: Freddy F. at 5:07 PM [+] ::
::
(0) comments
::
:: 11.12.2002 ::
Go Raiders! Way to end that streak.
So I'm in the same old situation here at work, again. My boss isn't here. I have nothing to work on. I don't know what he wants me to do next. He hasn't answered my questions I left him Friday and I haven't had face-time with him since Thursday. I'm stuck. I have one project, and I don't have all the info I need and I don't have a program to go off of. So I'm "stuck" reading blogs and emails and writing blogs and emails, and just in general goofing off. This isn't bad on days that I'm here alone, but now my co-worker(s) are here and I feel bad not doing anything while they are working.
I got an email from an old friend the other day. It sounds weird to refer to someone as an "old friend" when I am still so young, but when you haven't heard from them in three years, I think it qualifies. So that opens a whole new portal of social relations for me to explore. It's like when you are working around in Minesweeper and suddenly you click on one that opens to a bunch more, it just feels better.
I'm dreaming in contours. The alarm goes off and I'm thinking crazy things like "That says 7.17, I wonder what the real grade is. How far am I going to have to chase this to meet grade?" before stumbling back into a warm doze. And in my mind I'm picturing the little dashed contours that I have running across my site, telling me that this path I am on holds only disaster. Death by too much Cut.
And speaking of the professional end of things, she is talking about things I understand. I could have a dialogue about this and it would finally be something intellectual (something I miss in the arts program of a state university). But alas, the site is already too popular for I found it on a major link system. It's like finding out someone you know is a pretty successful college football player on a dynastic team, but you found out by watching espn. To go back and try to be inside the fold and social seems too forced, too groupie-ish, and just too clingy. So I just gave you a link - the blog equivalent of name dropping.
As an update: Things are getting worked out for Tacoma. Starting and ending dates. Moving dates, reservations and plane ticket. Who, if anyone, I'm living with and what those living conditions will be. I feel terribly sorry for anyone who has less than months and months to do thid kind of planning for this calibre of a trip. I just need to find that truck topper - does anyone know where I can get one?
I have to say that I am proud of him being strong and not spending money, proud of him for coming back and making me anticipate the upcoming Holiday, proud of him for being a great athelete, and proud of her for not skipping class, because you are going to find that it will get easier and easier to do it the four, six, eight, or ten years you get to spend in college. He also makes me proud, but you'd never know it by what he [doesn't] write.
Crazy, I had so much to say and I never even got to the things I thought I would write about yesterday evening. Oh well, se la vie. 'Til we meet again...
"Somewhere in America, it's late at night. And you're far from home, but you know everything's alright..."
:: Freddy F. at 10:41 AM [+] ::
::
(0) comments
::
:: 11.11.2002 ::
Staring down the barrel of four project due dates this week. Time to pay the piper for lazing around a week ago. Maybe I'll just enjoy Thanksgiving that much more. People should let me know if they be around - I'll be in town from the Tuesday night through the Sunday around Thanksgiving, leaving town sporadically for family obligations. I say, "Let's do the Dubliner!" or I say, "Let's do the Fox and the Hound on Tuesday night!" Yes, that is what I say.
I cut my hair Friday night. No biggie, right? Wrong. For me: biggie. It was pretty long, and oh so cold getting out of the shower in the mornings. But this time it wasn't just the razor and done, this was a $13 professional cut, tapered on the sides and "longishly-short" on top. What one could call a Onederboy cut. No skinhead, no mohawks, no crazy flat-top thing, just a normal haircut. Biazarre.
Also saw Memento on Friday night. Very interseting. I'd like to make someone watch it for the fist time by flipping through the chapters in a chronological order to see if the end result is the same, just sans the suprise. It definitely kept me guessing, especially the whole "who is the bad guy" thing. It had the "I was an insurance claims guy turned neural-synapse psycho" of Fight Club, and the "What the hell is going on? Are we watching the reality or the delusion" of Mulholland Drive.
Hmmm, someone drew a parallel between Liberalism and No Tyranny. Interesting. The very essence of leading a revolution pro-compromise is to compromise with those who are trying to quelch the revolution.
I spent fifteen hours in studio yesterday. It looks like I will spend another fifteen in there today and everyday this week. Aside from eating, sleeping, and working, that is where I will be. Fortunately, that's where the computer is, so I can keep you all informed about the current studio-ings. God, I hate GIS (pronounced: gee-eye-ess, not: gizz).
I hope none of my friends have this problem, despite the fact that we are the survey area. But really, who among us ought to be worrying about that right now.
I have removed ol' Bob Borden from my list of links. Without being judgemental (which is hard because I had to make a judgment to decide whether to keep the link there or not), I cannot live my life the way I do, and promote the life he writes about. A fine website, I'll just let someone else link to it. Too much like the late Erma Bombeck or my roommate.
That's enough for today.
"It's nothing like the Bible, there's no lesson to be learned. It ain't the Ten Commandments, 'cause nothin's written in stone. It has to do with freedom and personal liberty. I don't fuck with you, don't fuck with me..."
:: Freddy F. at 10:34 AM [+] ::
::
(0) comments
::
:: 11.08.2002 ::
Due to the proximity of the season, and because I am at work and feel like I have accomplished nothing despite having been here for two hours, my blog will be kept short, insightful, and pleasant today. Here goes:
Things that I am thankful for:
- Friends (that if I move thousands of miles away, instead of just hundreds, I will not forget to call).
- That I can still find heroes in my everyday life.
- Crazy daisies and "Fairytale of New York" (even if it's a remake),
- Anticipation.
- That I haven't read every book, seen every movie, or heard every CD that I want to.
- What other people can do with my mouse icon.
- That I have a near-future in Tacoma to look forward to.
- Sunny November days.
You have a good one.
" 'I could have been someone.'
'But so could anyone. You took my dreams from me, when I first found you.'
'I kept them within me. I put them with my own. Can't make it all alone - I built my dreams around you..."
:: Freddy F. at 11:54 AM [+] ::
::
(0) comments
::
:: 11.06.2002 ::
Ah, more frost, only this time on my windshield - I had best be getting a new ice scraper or I am going to be pretty late for work these days.
Yesterday was election day for one-half of the seats of government. I didn't really pay attention. I should, but I don't. I know that I should pay attention to these things so much, that just the fact that I don't pay attention makes me want to stop writing out of shame. But I won't stop writing, and I will tell you this: Kansas has elected a democratic governor. So maybe instead of all of our education money going into funding road construction and manufacturing, the money will stay in education. I just hope she doesn't turn out to be a big pussy like that Ben Nelson clown. But fear not, I may be an ignorant fool, but I am not a voting ignorant fool. My roommate says that if you don't know, then you should just vote for whomever your parents/family/friends are voting for - I say that is nuts, you shoudl leave the voting up to the informed public. Maybe that isn't as democratic, but at least it is elitism for a logical reason
Also yesterday was my big, fat, twenty-second birthday anniversary. I don't know what this means. I have been trying to downplay my birthday for a couple years now, trying not to think about it or get too excited about it. I'm not sure why - I just feel weird claiming attention for an entire day. But I would like to thank everyone who called me to wish me a "happy birthday" because it still means a lot to hear from you. And I'd like to double thank those of you who gave me presents, because you just can't beat 'Crazy-Daisies.' And I'd like to triple thank those of you who gave birth to me twenty-two years ago - that was just downright swell of you.
But now is just another day. And I'm pretty happy to be alive.
"Make a little birdhouse in your soul..."
:: Freddy F. at 11:52 AM [+] ::
::
(0) comments
::
:: 11.04.2002 ::
The first real, hard frost hit the ground last night. It was beautiful, everything covered with that thin layer of white, all the puddles capped with ice, everything smells so fresh and sterile. And then, as the sun pokes through the clouds and the frost begins to burn off, the trees begin to shed their leaves, so there is a constant rain of the yellows and the reds of the oaks and maples. There are few things that are better than walking through the piles of abscised leaves on the sidewalks that no one has walked through yet, and watching the first frost fade into dew as the sun gradually moves across the open spaces.
And on the exact opposite note, from Friday at 11pm to Sunday at 11pm I spent no less than 34 hours laying down wither sleeping or watching TV. And it rocked. Let's hear it for stacking up the due dates. But now there is work to be done. I've got to get this housing thing figured out. Does anyone have any ideas on how to move me 2000 miles for eight months? Flying is already out, but truck-toppers are always an option.
Here is the movie review of the week: Crooklyn: I haven't really seen very many of Spike Lee's movies, but he's one of those directors that I know I need to see more. I'd have to say I liked this movie about the same as Do the Right Thing, but for different reasons. DtRT was about being black, or being white, or being Korean and the move revolved around issues of skin color. Conversely, Crooklyn was about being in a family. Yes, the family was black, yes I could see their skin color, but Crooklyn gave me faith that Spike Lee is able to do movies about more than just racial injustice or unrest. And bonus kudos for the soundtrack.
Off to work.
"Ooh-ooh, child, things are gonna get easier... ooh-ooh, child, things'll get brighter..."
:: Freddy F. at 9:24 AM [+] ::
::
(0) comments
::
:: 11.01.2002 ::
Well, I hope everyone had a very happy and safe Halloween, and no one got poisoned or got hit by a car or anything. I, of course, spent my evening doing things that were very studio oriented, involving a pot luck dinner that included faculty and potential employers. It feels good to already have that job and not have to worry about impressing people, whihc puts me at the ease to just be myself and I usually come across as something better.
Here is the best part - I stand here at 4 pm on a Friday afternoon, with nothing to do over the weekend. No studio has been assigned yet, Construction is not due for 17 days, no planning to work on or anything. I need to enroll, but that is all. And let me tell you, that is a great feeling. There is something to be said for working on weekdays.
So I guess I don't have much else to put here. I hope everyone is staying healthy and working hard and getting their shit done. I am looking forward to coming back for thanksgiving in four weeks and seeing everyone again. Take care. Peace, out.
"These crazy days..."
:: Freddy F. at 5:22 PM [+] ::
::
(0) comments
::
:: 10.30.2002 ::
I hate that class. God, I hate that class. I am going to try to keep my promise (goal) of not being judgemental toward people in the following diatribe, but I'm not sure of the success here. Argh, nevermind, forget teh diatribe. I just hate that class. Why must that class torment me so?! Why must my Mondays, Wednesdays, and Fridays suck so much? Maybe things will be better if I can just escape...
"To be in the shade, the only trees above my head..."
:: Freddy F. at 4:56 PM [+] ::
::
(0) comments
::
Man, what a busy busy day - no time for Fred, that's for sure. But now the studio project is done, the Construction project is done and it is time for a little R&R.
Here is the big news you have all been waiting for: I got the job I wanted. Haven't worked out all the nitty-gritty yet, but that is certainly a weight off my shoulders. So from January to August of 2003 I will be locating myself in the beautiful Pacific Northwest, running, reading, and working to my little heart's content.
And, in order of chronology, not importance, I'd like to wish my sister a wonderful wonderful twentieth birthday today. That's right folks, she is now two decades old. Damn, that's ancient [as I crawl off sobbing and mourning lost opportunities]. Happy birthday, Sis, and may all your days be happy and bright.
I am sorry to see these two fellows calling it quits for a while. I wish you both a speedy recovery in whatever draws you away from this growing-ly necessary form of communication. Possibly a reunion around Thanksgiving...?
And on the topic of reunions - should he come to visit me on this apparently quiet weekend coming up here? Let me know.
B-dunk-a-dunk
"You don't know me, let alone my intent; actions do not always self-represent. I don't feel a need for explaining, my conscience opaquely clear..."
:: Freddy F. at 12:09 AM [+] ::
::
(0) comments
::
:: 10.28.2002 ::
I had a teacher who once said: "If it is hard, don't do it. You won't anyway, so don't stress over the fact that you aren't doing it." I'm running into a brick wall here at work. I have one current assignment, to grade about ten acres for a soccer field, a football field, and a baseball field. Currently, there is little to no slope, which means standing water... that's bad. I need to create slope, just a little, like 1%. So I create it. And the Boss says "Too much grading. Do less." And there I'm stuck. I've been stuck for about three days now. He doesn't give me new work, so I just keep staring at this field. Then when I get tired of doing that, I play minesweeper. When I feel guilty about doing that, I go back to staring. This viscious cycle must end, but how? or when? I can't get the earthwork down. ARRRGH.
So it was a good weekend. Went and saw Rocky Horror Picture Show in a big group and did the whole throwing crap and yelling crap thing. It was fun, but the movie is just kind of lame. Sometimes I wonder about these "cult" followings. Went to a "pimps and hos" party and saw a lot of flesh. That was nice nice nice. My parents came out - got some early birthday presents. Went to a scholarship dinner. Watched some baseball, some football, some of this and that. Finished a good book. Beat the eye infection. Got to bed at a decent hour, felt good about living again.
I have thought of a great line to close a speech with. I even have a great topic and outline to go with the speech. Now I just need the opportunity to give the speech. Another reason that graduation cannot come too soon.
But I pregress.
"Like wakin' up from a fucked up dream, suddenly everything's looking good..."
:: Freddy F. at 10:03 AM [+] ::
::
(0) comments
::
:: 10.25.2002 ::
Okay, so I've got a lot to go on today, let's see how much we get in before the Boss arrives.
First: I have a problem. I have several really, that lead to worse problems. Maybe they aren't as bad as his are, but they are bad. See, the first problem is I have terrible vision. Downright crummy. I can't really see this computer screen without some sort of assistance. So I wear corrective lenses. Secondly, I don't sleep a whole lot. This means that when three am rolls around and I'm turning out the light, I know I'll have to put my contacts in again in three hours or so, so it's really easy to say 'eh, I'll take them out tomorrow night.' This all leads to the problem of me wearing my contacts anywhere from four to ten days on end. This leads to a potentially dangerous problem of eye infections, so bad that the muscle that dialates the pupil cramps up and they won't dialate, thus allowing too much light in and making it very hard for me to open my eyes. The temorary fix is to not wear contacts for a bit while the eye recouperates. I do this then return to old habits and the infections also come back. This week I decided to permanently fix the problem - I would wear glasses until my eyes were "as white as driven snow." I hate wearing glasses because they get dirty, they bend, they distort vision, and they are just damn uncomfortable, but I was determined to wear them nonetheless. I wore them for three days before a classmate (whom I trust and respect) said they were terrible, that they were ridiculous and last fashionable many years ago. I hardly need to say that I was crushed. I true friend coming around and cracking you one like that can really cut deep. It hasn't determined whether I wear them or not and for the most part I have brushed it off and I really could care less what she thinks about them now, but at the moment I was reminded just how thin our skin can be.
But that was the worst of yeaterday. A better side of yesterday was awarding the prize of "Greatest Vote" to him, for telling me that he was busy taking care of business on Tuesday, even skipping a dinner with an award winning author of one of my favorite reads. Way to go, dude. I hope your efforts will pay off soon and you get a little R&R time.
I think yesterday was a pretty egocentric day on my part. Not only was my ego inflated by the words and praise of others, I did a little ego pumping of my own. And I got to thinking about how judgemental I can be. I try not to be. For the last six or seven months I have tried to make a conscious effort accept people for who they are and if I have a problem with it, it is just that: my problem. I have role models that I follow, people who seem to not have the need or even desire to meddle in the affairs of others - I put myself in company with these people adn try to ignore the others. It comes back to me anyhow, because I think a lot of people around me can be slanderous and I will be the first to admit that I take part in the backstabbing as well. I feel that it is too vain to hope that my insecurity-based arrogance has not cost me friendships, but I will look forward with this problem. From here on out: I won't judge people based on my own personal values (and sometimes double standards). I hope that by constant repetition of the idea that "I will not judge others," that I will reallly stop judging people, especially based on my own egocentric, self-promoting standards.
That was an emotionally exhausting paragraph, that took much longer to write than read. Maybe I'll hit you back later.
"It sucks me in when you're aloof. It sucks me in, it sucks it works, I guess it's cool to be alone..."
:: Freddy F. at 9:52 AM [+] ::
::
(0) comments
::
:: 10.23.2002 ::
I had almost forgotten how great it is to walk through campus at 3.30 am and back the other way at 6.30 am. It is so quiet and peaceful. And today it is cold, so very cold. The first real cold day of the season. It's funny how autumn seems to last about one week around here. The temperatures go from 80 to 30 and the trees go from green to twig in about 7 days. Alas, I yearn for milder climes.
I have checked on all my grades and have found... that I'm passing all my classes! Yea!
I had this notion while I was walking up the stairs yesterday. I thought that it felt like a day that was geared toward just taking care of business, getting the stuff that needs to be done, done. But I felt like it wasn't just me that was spending the day accomplishing tasks, it felt like it was everybody. It felt like a day that no one, no where, was taking off the day to go play golf, or going on vacation, or anything like that. On Tuesday the 22nd of October, I beleive that no one called in sick to go have fun, if they called in sick it was because they were. While this may sound depressing, it wasn't a feeling of people being slaves to money, or their job, or such, it was more a feeling of "well, I have this much stuff to do and once I get done with that I can relax, so I'm going to go like hell today and relax later this week" Or maybe I just transposed the way I was feeling onto the entire world. So here's what we're going to do: you let me know whether you were just having a good ol' time yesterday or if you were working to get things accomplished and I will have the results Friday on whether I have my thumb on the pulse of this world (or on the pulse of this world that is my "reading audience") or not.
"Now a bee in a bird's nest never made no honey, and a bird in a hive sang no song..."
:: Freddy F. at 8:46 AM [+] ::
::
(0) comments
::
:: 10.22.2002 ::
Well fudge, soocer is over. And it ended on a very "so I guess we got screwed by the Rec once again" note. Apparently we had a game on Sunday at 1. No one told anyone, no one from our team got the message, no one showed up, we forfeited, we're done. How very anti-climactic. So in all, I spent $50, played 2 games, practiced a dozen times and learned alot about a new sport that I can really enjoy as I grow older.
So I'm at work now. Writing stuff here. Seems like a sham really, how I can get all my work done in an hour or two, then spend the rest of my time just goofing off. My boss never come in before 9 and rarely before 10 and sometimes not until 11. Yet he only gives me a finite amount of work, so I end up with dead "on the clock" time. I guess it is good, it gives my mind a chance to unwind and relax. But I still feel bad because my co-workers have stuff to do, so they are stuck with that and I'm just playing Minesweeper for hours on end. But, that's the breaks.
Things I hate:
Working on something so hard, that you dream about it. I dreamt in AutoCAD last night (very much not the first time I have done that) about horizontal curves.
Warm toilet seats - it sounds comforting, but unless you are going twice in a row, well, that's just gross.
Here's another gross one: Seeing that stain on the ground and on the side of a building that I left there by puking on it several weeks ago. Yea, beer. The legacy continues.
Man, this page has just gone straight downhill. Talk about a slippery slope. Debator's? Can I get an "amen?"
"Once again, I'm stuck in here..."
:: Freddy F. at 11:24 AM [+] ::
::
(0) comments
::
:: 10.21.2002 ::
Wow, what a weekend. World Series, visiting friends, horizontal curves, movies, and oh so much more, I don't even know where to begin.
First, I'd like to thank the OnederBoy for making drinking and playing Super Mario World the most fun it has been in a long time. 96 worlds, baby, 96 worlds. Have a safe drive, mon ami.
I would also like to review the following movies I saw:
My Big Fat Greek Wedding - my god, the cleavage. Overall, it was a funny movie, with lots of funny little jokes about all of life's and romance's little foibles. That's right, foibles. Otherwise, I'm not sure if it has earned the critical acclaim that it deserves, and if it has it is more a reflection of the movies that have come in recent history. We're just all suprised we actually enjoyed a movie not containing serial killers, huge explosions, or hobbits/wizards.
Le Pacte de Loups (aka The Brotherhood of the Wolf) - The best I can figure is this was two movies in one. The first part was slow, somewhat romantic, somewhat whimsical, and mostly blasse. Then, it got good. Not great, but cool. However, there should be a limit on how many people critical to the plot can come back to life after being killed.
DogTown and Z-Boys - Informative to say the least. There is something that makes it great that it only mentions the X-Games once, and you only see Tony Hawk as an idolizer of skateboarding genius. There is something that makes it bad because the "culture" of skateborading has not reached a point where it has taken over everything or the point where it has vanaished, and therefore doesn't really need a documentary made on it. But there was a lot of cool moves and a lot of cool hair and a lot of cool people. Makes me want to start a scene.
I would also like to review the following books I read:
Watership Down - well, I can't imagine that the movie was any good (in much the same vein as Animal Farm) but a story about political little bunnies was pretty damn good. It was slow at first, I couldn't figure out why exactly I was reading it, but by the end I was in the clutches of the book and helpless to get myself out. One more book off the list, and well worth my time.
Everybody loves a good close match up.
Time to bust out some vertical curves and get this road alignment in.
"The pain I seem to put myself through, the ways I finally submit to you, cat-o-nine tails getting old..."
:: Freddy F. at 4:13 PM [+] ::
::
(0) comments
::
:: 10.18.2002 ::
I just checked my counter (allbeit small in number). I'd like to thank all of his friends for visiting. I hope you enjoyed your stay and you come back real soon...
*Whistling theme from "Green Acres"...*
:: Freddy F. at 11:18 AM [+] ::
::
(0) comments
::
Well, I keep starting and stopping this one - before work there wasn't enough time, at work I am under constant fear of getting caught (do you think they would fire me?) and a general anxiety that maybe I should be doing a little more to improve this plant palette. Whatever.
I kind of sucks, being fall break and all. A well deserved day off class if you ask me, but I can't sleep in because Girlfriend has to work, and alas, so do I. So I'm up and atom. Killing time at work - hoping to get some serious construction done this afternoon. Gotta pound out those horizontal curves and stations. Chic-Fil-A for lunch, always a wonderful reward.
[side note: when I read other people's blogs, people I don't know, I always try to find out more information than what they have actually written. Much like a movie can be "dated" by fashion, lingo, or the occasional TAB can, blogs can give away gender, age, geography, occupation, or a multitude of other things, simply by being read between the lines. I find this aspect of the random blog reading simply rad.]
I haven't talked about the big Move in a while now, things have kind of plateau'd a little. Hopefully in the next week there will be a pelethora (sp?) of information coming in, namely where I will be living, where I will be working, what I will be making, and when I will be starting. I am very anxious to have these answers. A lot of people have been securing their internships so far and are going to such amazing places as Kansas City, Dallas, and Denver. Not that these are bad places, but I think Seattle is just right for me.
Which brings up an interesting idea, I'm going to toss it out there, and in the spirit of the "voting on my blog" craze, I'll let you let me know what you think. Since there hasn't been a good party in a while and since there hasn't been a good New Year's in a while, adn since I will be leaving town shortly after the aformentioned date, I was thinking about having a little New Years get-together of sorts. Things that will be included will be: sending my parents to a hotel for the evening, prefereably the nice Ramada downtown; inviting everyone I know, especially those I haven't seen in years; getting a keg (or pony keg, depending on how many people I think I know). Don't think the irony of "bad new years" and "me getting a keg" is lost, but hey, if I'm in charge, then I will do a lot better job of handling myself in a proper respectable manner. In anycase, if you think it is worth a shot, give a shout.
"Proppa..."
:: Freddy F. at 11:11 AM [+] ::
::
(0) comments
::
:: 10.17.2002 ::
And as he once said: "Arrgh!"
You see, my stupid game got stupid cancelled because some stupid refs couldn't stand in the stupid cold for fifty stupid minutes while we played. I know there is some great adjective to describe all this, but I can't think of it right now. I even had my gameface on. I guess the game shall wait. As will the booze.
In the meantime I am doing my best to learn how to play cricket. I keep seeing these newspaper articles about it, and I have found that it has all the great fun of baseball, only with honor and dignity, instead of greed and drugs. It's hard to learn a new sport without playing it, but I can't seem to round up the 21 other non-americans that I would need to play.
Plus, my school is very much out of money - go Big 12!
"I envy the hungry, as I eat my words again. Appealing yet appalling, rising to my calling, Going to extremes as I am gagging on this seed, dragging on this scene, gagging on this scene..."
:: Freddy F. at 11:17 AM [+] ::
::
(0) comments
::
:: 10.16.2002 ::
My windshield's busted.
But for those of you who know me - it's still nicer to be in a truck than on a motorcycle.
Tonight is the last soccer game of the regular season. In most dramatic fashion: if we win, we go to the playoffs and we'll go out and get ripped tonight; if we lose, we'll just go get ripped. Gotta win - the vibe is good, I feel the soccer jonesin up inside me. Tonight, no hold's barred, no injuries count, and no quarter given. Tonight, as we used to say in the track days, it's balls to the black. (Or, as a famous gym teacher used to say 'It's all cajones, ladies.") Too bad the game is a mere 12 hours away, across three and a half hours of work, five hours of class, three group presentations, two meals, and one episode of the simpsons. May the force be with us.
Sorry to he who wasn't included in the pronoun-weblink fiasco yesterday - maybe that's a good sign I should call him...
"I work hard for the money..."
:: Freddy F. at 8:46 AM [+] ::
::
(0) comments
::
:: 10.15.2002 ::
Alright, well, I guess the Royal "We" is back on the right track again. I'm busting nuts like nobody's businees... so much so, that I didn't even have time to turn on my computer until about 8 o'clock tonight. Which prevented me from saying these things earlier:
Happy mother of all birthdays to this crazy cat. I hope you enjoyed the first two and one-fifth decades of your life.
And: I'm sorry he can't see them in this.
And: I'm sorry he can't go see him but maybe he can come see this.
Back to being busy and taking care of the business at hand.
Here is the new mentality, the song that has been running through my head, driving me to recreate what I once was:
"So fuck y'all, all y'all, if you don't like me, blow me. Y'all gonna keep fuckin around with me, gonna turn me back to the old me..."
:: Freddy F. at 9:52 PM [+] ::
::
(0) comments
::
:: 10.14.2002 ::
It seems to me that humans, having lousy night-vision and a great lack of overall body hair, or "fur," ought not be active during the cooler nighttime hours. This seems to be the evolutionary demand, and yet the further I delve myself into the chores and demands of life, the more I find myself being active during these same nighttime hours I am supposed to be sleeping through. At the risk of sounding unappreciative, I say that the light bulb, the central heating system, and more specifically, the ESRI ArcGIS software are all making my life glum.
However, there was that point in my life where I strove (strived?) to become greater than the evolutionary process and devolve sleep from my life. I was good, too. I could pull three hours a night for 13 straight days, and once went 52 hours without sleeping. But it was after that last stint, resulting in 16 hours of sleep in 18 hours, that I realized how good sleep is. Now, I can't seem to get below the five hours per night mark, and even that I cannot sustain for very long. Am I getting too old to be doing this? Have I just lost my passion for my work? My work is different than it was two years or even five months ago, but is that it, or have I lost my competitive edge? I just find it harder and harder to focus on the work at hand, bust the proverbial "balls," and get shit taken care of. It doesn't help that I am also getting fat.
Maybe this is where I should draw the line in the sand. Sitting at my desk at work, at 9.45 on a Monday, I want to say "Alright, that's it. Love handles be damned, it's time to whip this shit around!" Time to start going to the rec, time to start pulling those late nights. There was a time when I thought of myself as tough, sinew-y, raw, and sound. I now think of myself as a tub of margairine - not even the drive to be real butter. I am saying now (since I have given myself a nice little Knute Rockne kind of pep-talk) that the rest of this semester is going to be maintaining - not getting any worse. Next semester, there will be trials. Seattle will be a training ground to find the old me (that I have buried under too many late night trips to Wendy's). It's time.
"Knuckle up, bitch..."
:: Freddy F. at 10:47 AM [+] ::
::
(0) comments
::
:: 10.13.2002 ::
Oh sweet Blurst, how I neglect thee.
And how I neglect my friends... it sounds terrible, but sometimes it is just easier to say "I'll call tomorrow" and then never do it. I probably will be friendless by the time I'm thirty. And homeless, to boot.
People in Washington D.C. and in Bali should stop killing other people.
I hate group projects.
Please visit the sponsors. And the guy who made this blog get updated (albeit even 24 hours after it was supposed to be).
"My words are like a dagger with a jagged edge, that'll stab you in the head..." Just 'cuz I quote it doesn't mean I agree with it...
:: Freddy F. at 10:42 PM [+] ::
::
(0) comments
::
:: 10.03.2002 ::
Man, here I am busting my butt to get this project done, and lo and behold, the serve is down, so I can't print. Sure there are other aspects of this project I can do without having the master plan print out, but it sure would be nice to get that out of the way. Alas, I am afraid that for the time being I am "slave to the [metaphoical] traffic light" that is the Deskjet 800G...
Oh sweet! I'm in!
Game on...
:: Freddy F. at 12:09 AM [+] ::
::
(0) comments
::
:: 10.01.2002 ::
First off, I'd like to thank a fine upstanding lad for recommending that I keep up on my current events. Now I am avoiding what I have to do, more than ever, but at least I am an informed citizen.
Secondly, you can all stop worrying about my commitments because I have decided to take care of the most urgent things first (makes sense, right?). My soccer team and planning test shall prevail. Master plan be damned, that's the way it's going to be.
Thirdly... aw shit, I forgot what that was going to be... no wait, I remember. I now owe my Construction teacher a six pack of Miller's (stupid traverse question). Hope he likes MGD. (And for those of you who know I am pretty much a Bud Light kind of guy, don't worry, I think I can handle this switch.)
Finally, I have done some thinking about age and growing up today, realizing that I am but 21 years old and I have had a pretty long enjoyable life. So if I live this long again, I'll be forty-two and that is still pretty young and still able to do lots of things. So I think I will work on some sort of list of things I want to do before I am forty-two. Let's say 40 because that is nice and round. Still a long time.
"I confess it's a shame when you're livin' in a city that's the size of a box and nobody knows your name."
"Glad I came..."
:: Freddy F. at 5:51 PM [+] ::
::
(0) comments
::
:: 9.30.2002 ::
Ah, the final day of September... too bad it's going to be friggin' 91 degrees out. It just isn't cool to be that hot outside. Ha ha, little pun there. Eh... whatever.
Still working on that getting in contact with people - it's funny because I missed an opportunity to actually visit with someone on my list whom I physically saw back home, but I already had stuff to do and it's always hard for me to drop some people for others. So if you're reading, know I'm sorry and I will call soon.
One more day until the first Construction project is due. I'm a little concerned. It'll get done, but what's the cost. I still haven't shaken that sore throat that plagued me all last week (it was worse because of the drinking last Friday night and the soccer game on Wednesday), I already felt sick to my stomach when I got up this morning, and it looks like it will be about Wednesday night before I sleep again. I can handle that, but work and soccer are going to be tough on Wednesday. I feel worst about letting my teams (work and soccer) down. Oh well, I know what I have to do.
Which is go to work...
K'pow!
:: Freddy F. at 8:34 AM [+] ::
::
(0) comments
::
:: 9.29.2002 ::
Here's my reviews of Pop Culture:
Monsters, Inc: Gad, that movie is funny - I haven't laughed so hard in years. And so sad! I haven't been that close to crying in almost a year. And that little girl - so cute! It's almost enough to make me maternal.
Amelie: Another cute girl, but in a very different way. I thought it was a lot like Ten Things I Hate About You, with the whole "boy likes girl / girl likes boy, they can't actually come out and say what they feel for reasons of self doubt and image, they manipulate each other until it seems like things aren't going to work out, and then a single burst by one character or another places them in each other's arms, where, without a word they fall into wild passionate sex." The narrator was funny, the french was novel.
UHF: Yup, it's Wierd Al in DVD format. Well worth my "tithe" from my first week at work to Best Buy.
System of a Down - Toxicity: This is what metal is supposed to be - fast, loud, crack-your-back, headbanging fun. Not this pussy radio-metal or emo-metal or whatever the hell the latest lite rock metal sound is. And it isn't this we've-raided-our-moms-makeup-drawer-and-can-scream-and-put-lots-of-fake-blood-into-our-grainy-blurry-videos metal, that's theatrics, not music. Fuck MTV and videos and "images," let the music speak and if it rocks, it rocks.
Unwritten Law - Elva: I go half and half on this one. Some songs rock, the ones that I wear out the "back" button listening to over and over again. Some songs just sound like tripe, literally, the sounds that tripe make. I guess that is why we have CD players, right.
Props to the Motherland, for showering me with recognition and memories upon my every return.
Time to Masta' Plan...
:: Freddy F. at 4:17 PM [+] ::
::
(0) comments
::
:: 9.27.2002 ::
Ten days! Fuck me! Where have I been... this has got to stop. No more pushing the blog off. Five minutes and if I don't have that to spare each day, then I had better be damn well giving up the crossword too. Maybe I can just give up one of my classes instead...
Everyone's gone, I hear from no one. Not that it is not entirly my fault. I don't call people any more. When Newsie is writing and calling more than you are, you have troubles. And now I'm returning to the motherland for a weekend and am so out of touch that everyone was back last weekend and no one will even be there this weekend.
Alright, now I have a list of 9 people to talk to in the next week. That's right, I have one week to talk to nine people I haven't talked to in probably *sigh* a month. I'm going to do this and I'm going to keep up with the blog, too. You think I can't? You don't think I got the cajones? You feelin' me?
I just read this [soon to be linked, as soon as This Bitch Computer and Internet Exploer stop fuckin up on me] other blog, nice and random from the "recently posted" list. It was fun. I feel strangely moved by this blog - like I have made half of some sort of emotional connection. It was about girls and high school and was pretty nostalgic for 7.30 on a friday morning. They refered to girls as bird and "hunting" them was trying to date them, I guess. It's funny because I could have got anything and I got something that sounds a lot like where I stood four years ago.
I'm anxious to see fall in the motherland. It is a very peaceful experience for me. I love the smells and the burbs and the trees... peace, I guess. It ain't NCY, but what is, eh?
Now the list is ten people. It's fuckin ON.
Now I'm late for work...
:: Freddy F. at 8:53 AM [+] ::
::
(0) comments
::
:: 9.17.2002 ::
Alright, the ol' blog was fucking with me last friday, which discouraged me from adding any to it the last few days, but I'm ready to get back into the swing of things.
Here are the movies I have seen in the last week: SLC Punk, Swordfish, Hearts in Atlantis, Men of Honor... hm, it seemed like a lot more, but nothing comes to mind. But I now understand how my friends who constantly see movies and are constantly telling me how many movies they are seeing do it - if you have HBO it is just like watching TV. So I can flip back forth between say, a shitty Nebraska football game and the shitty movie Hearts in Atlantis, and feel like I just saw both of them. That's efficient TV time.
Here is what I did in studio this last week: Finished that damn group project, outlined a program for the creation of a mixed housing development, created a program analysis, performed a site inventory and analysis on the proposed site, drank some beers, cut some sections on the proposed site, and got an hour of my life taken away by allowing a single person to debate the symantic difference between "environmental" and "ecological" (environmental is the surrounding forces, ecological is the interrelationships).
Now we have the assignment to play SimCity3000 for a week and study the way people come to live in places. Here is the flaw in that, which I think will become my thesis when I have to write a paper on this: SimCity3000 is a computer program that is based on a highly European dynastic city philosophy that Growth =Progress =Good, that the faster a city grows the greater it will become. In the game, when an area gets filled, people don't stop coming, they keep coming and building unti the density is unhealthy. In someways this lemmings mentality is very realistic because there aren't the kind of sustainability laws that are necessary to regulate the population. There is also the beleif that Industry can shirk taxees in SimCity3000 that cannot be overridden. Let me tell you that if I was mayor, there would be no polution in the water or the air near residential areas because industry woul dbe cleaning it up - in fact, I doubt there'd be industry because I'd rather live in an area of low prodction rather than grand wealth. There are also guff I have with public transportation, power sources, and auto traffic, but hey, no need to bore you.
Here is what I did in my free time in the last week: went to the bars, drank brews, watched football on TV, slept and ate, went out to dinner, played soccer, ran, and went to a city planning meeting. Qualtiy.
Here is what I didn't do that I should have done: Called my friend in South Carolina who works at a vinyard, called this friend to make sure he's still alive, called my friend because her team lost, bought socks for soccer before now, written out that planning paper, and read my site analysis chapters. But I got four crosswords totally done.
Fred out...
:: Freddy F. at 11:09 AM [+] ::
::
(0) comments
::
:: 9.13.2002 ::
Go bluegrass go!
Man, the Freddy F. at 5:34 PM [+] ::
::
(0) comments
::
:: 9.12.2002 ::
I am finally getting that Bluegrass fix that I knew I needed, and I'm rocking right along with it.
We played our first soccer game last night and got smoked, 0-5. We just weren't as good a team as they were. We have really good players on our team, but everyone kind of plays by their own style (indoor, trap, press, 3-3-2, 3-2-3, 2-3-3). So they kept beating us on fast breaks. And the refs don't call offsides, so they just set one guy back and kick to him when our defenders are all pulled up. Oh well, the bars afterwords made it worth all the pain of losing an intramural game.
On the topic of making The List smaller, I finally saw Dr. Strangelove. It was really funny. I get the upper layers of the satire, but not necessarily the whole Dr. Strangelove character, or the multiple allusions to "love" when discussing the hydrogen bomb and the Doomsday Device. The best I figure is that the whole Second World War was fought to "free the world of fascism," but weapons of mass destruction are even more evil than any fascist ruler, and by selecting just a few who will survive the blast we are allowing for the sort of genocide that the Nazis advocated. I could be wrong...
"Ja wohl, Mein President"...
:: Freddy F. at 10:59 AM [+] ::
::
(0) comments
::
:: 9.11.2002 ::
I am the Napoleon of the multi-disciplinary design group, the Ghengis Khan of the Aging-in-Place, the Gandhi of intragroup communication. Apparently I am not the George Burns of anything, because people still aren't laughing...
:: Freddy F. at 5:16 PM [+] ::
::
(0) comments
::
Here is what is important:
I am not dead. Girlfriend did not kill me because I locked her out of her house. She forgave and forgot, which makes her a better person than I who can merely forgive (and even then it's sometimes a little weak).
This whole group project thing went very very sour very very fast. After only one week, the group memebers are very much pointing fingers and passing the buck and throwing in the hat. I don't think anyone is pointing fingers at me, and I'd like to think I put some pretty good effort in to all of this, but the group is decidedly "busted." I wish people laughed more. Or didn't take professional criticism personally.
And as much as I tried to keep it a nine-eleven-free blog today, I do have a little something to say: Public greiving seems a lot like public prayer - a little shallow and a little hollow. All I know is that if someone killed someone I cared about, I wouldn't want it on the news everyday.
I still have more stuff to talk about - it's still to come. Just not right now, sweetie, I have a headache...
:: Freddy F. at 2:51 PM [+] ::
::
(0) comments
::
:: 9.09.2002 ::
I hate it when I am talking to someone who I know is extremely mad at me and probably wants to kill me, but they are talking all calm and are saying things like "Don't worry about it" and "Your life will end soon" and such.
Man, I'm in the doghouse now...
:: Freddy F. at 2:26 PM [+] ::
::
(0) comments
::
I had the following things to write about today: Buying a car, watching Donnie Darko, working on group projects, shopping at Sam's Club, getting an awesome Sopranos picture, playing soccer, the essence of blogging, and talking to friends. However all of these things have been pre-empted by my latest story (not yet one hour old) of locking my girlfriend out of her house.
Yes, this is what my grandfather would call "a real boner" on my part. The set up: I mortally loathe crickets. My girlfriend lives in a basement apartment that has a door that locks at the top of the stairs leading outside, and a door that locks at the bottom of the stairs leading into her apartment. The top door is a dead bolt lock, while the door at the bottom of the stairs is a push-button lock that the inside knob releases. I have a key to the top lock (as does Girlfriend), but no one (including the landlord) has a key to the bottom lock.My key is a copy of Girlfriend's, made at WalMart that sometimes doesn't work very well to lock the top door. This morning: Girlfriend went to work as usual. I got up, showered and went to leave. Upon closing the bottom door, I saw a huge cricket sitting on the stiars. In my own cowardice, I jumped over him and ran out the top door. I tried to lock the top door. I tried for about three minutes, jiggling and rattling the lock, hoping the tumblers would fall. Alas, they did not. I had the idea to just lock the bottom door, like Girlfriend had done the other night (the idea that I had did not include the vital information that she was inside when she locked it). I went back down the stairs and saw the cricket had moved in between the bottom stair and the door. So when I opened the door the cricket got in. I chased the cricket in, kept it in the middle of the kitchen, grabbed some tupperware, spent five minutes trying to get the cricket under the tupperware, finally got it and flushed it down the toilet. Threw said tupperware in the sink, thinking Girlfriend would be so grateful I prevented the cricket access to her house, she would be more than happy to wash a piece of tupperware with her dishes. Then I proceded with the plan of locking the door and pulling it shut behind me. FUCK It hits me like a ton of bricks. Everyone is now locked out of this space. I call Girlfriend and leave a message on her cell. I bang head repeatedly on the wall. I am waiting for the return call. I'm so dead.
Fred, out...
:: Freddy F. at 10:18 AM [+] ::
::
(0) comments
::
:: 9.05.2002 ::
Wow, the last 24 hours have just been a mad rush of stuff to write - I will try to keep it simple.
I played in my first soccer scrimmage last night and I think it went very well. I kicked the ball well, not as hard as some of the other guys, but with a certain degree of accuracy. I had some steals, some blocks, some passes intercepted, some misses, some kicks to the shins, and a goal or two. I learned that I have good endurance, and as other people are waning, I can still sprint up and down the field. I also learned that I can get flat-out schooled, and some kid can dribble circles around me before I am able to even guess which direction he is going to go. All in all, it will definitely get me in shape.
So after said scrimmage, I decided I needed to wash up a bit before hitting studio. Since I was already in my dormitory living space I went ahead and used the dorm showers. The crazy thing was this was the first time I had used them. Now, before you think "Goddam that must be one smelly kid if that is the first he has showered in the last two weeks" know that I ususally shower in the morning - it wakes you up and invigorates the soul. And since I have the luxury of being involved with a girl who has a one-bedroom apartment, that is where I find myself when it comes time for me to shower, so I just shower there. But yeah, back in the dorm showers, one step above showering in the high school locker room.
I got back from the shower and lo, my mother had called. So I returned the call and she informed me that a wonderful firm in Tacoma, Washington wants to employ my services for the first eight months of next year. Sounds like a win-win to me!
There was also a development on the drumming front regarding why my band kicked me out last year. But all that is kind of a bummer of a story, so I don't think I am going to dwell on it. Let's just say "secrets don't make friends" and that should suffice.
That's all, y'all...
:: Freddy F. at 10:22 AM [+] ::
::
(0) comments
::
:: 9.04.2002 ::
First I'd like to thank the Boy of Stuff for letting me know that my links were not up to the par we like to keep here at the Blurst. I apologize for any inconvenience and now expect my counter to just start counting like mad.
It seems like everytime I go back to school, I make a few purchases that seem necessary, but also seem like something that I am only going to use for a short period of time and then leave to collect dust in my basement. This year I have purchased a pair of soccer shinguards. Yes, due to a late summer jaunt into the world of recreational soccer I have joined an intramural soccer league, which required me to not only play with shinguards, but skill as well. It is yet to be determined whether I have what it takes to compete against the people who have been playing since they were five. I am a little apprehensive about tonights scrimmage. If I think about it, this is where I will post all my game-stats. If I create any.
And speaking of game-stats, I'd like to be the first (only) to congratulate the Greatest Team in Baseball for finally winning at home. Jesus H it was about time. 26 games left, they are only 24.5 games back. They could pull it off...
:: Freddy F. at 12:12 PM [+] ::
::
(0) comments
::
:: 9.03.2002 ::
It was a weekend of big times and even bigger tits. Yes, that's right, the latest Playboys have arrived and while there is a literal plethora of lovely airbrushed Big 12 flesh, there is no Whitney. Eh, se la vie, we didn't want to see how much she had shaved anyway. But man, lets hear it for the "midwestern girls".
Returning to my domestic reality, I spent the weekend in Caldwell, Kansas, a quaint little town on the southern border. It was nice and relaxing, and amazingly I was able to do something I haven't really been able to do all summer: watch four very good movies in the span of 24 hours. The Client, Pretty in Pink, O Brother Where Art Thou? and Brewsters Millions. Man, that was all pretty rad. And for those of you who know the real Fred, you know I keep a list of media I need to be involved in - O Brother Where Art Thou? affected every aspect of this list - the movie was crossed off, the Odyssey was added to the books, and most importantly, the Soundtrack was added to the Albums section. Which leads to my latest epiphany: I have missed out on a lot of great music, but not having ever really listened to Bluegrass. So those of you who are hip to the Bluegrass jive, you gotta tell me what I need to know to be in this loop.
[This was crazy: for a while there my keyboard was not typing, it was just making little clicking noises. So I opened a few windows and closed a few windows and finally it began working again. I guess I'm just that good at fixing my computer. Whatever.]
I suppose that is enough for this fine day. Play safe...
:: Freddy F. at 11:40 AM [+] ::
::
(0) comments
::
:: 8.29.2002 ::
Counter's working. Let the good times "roll"...
I was challenged to make a top-ten-movies list today. I have been challenged to this before, but since I have a much less epicurian style of viewing movies than my friends do, I often hesitate for fear of ridicule. But now I can do things in near-anonymity and I am therefore much braver.
So here are the top ten movies that I like, not really in much of an order, just the order I thought of them and wrote them down.
Rushmore
Shawshank Redemption
Silverado
Return of the Jedi
Chasing Amy
Varsity Blues
American History X
Jurassic Park
A Christmas Story
The Sandlot
These are movies that fit my criteria and that I can watch over and over again, therefore my favorites.
Got guff? Fuck off
:: Freddy F. at 4:30 PM [+] ::
::
(0) comments
::
Trying to get the counter to work...
Any suggestions?
:: Freddy F. at 1:22 PM [+] ::
::
(0) comments
::
"Guess who's back/
Back again/
Freddie's back/
Tell a friend"
That's right, kid-a-reenos, Fred R. Flextimer is back with all the gusto of a hunger strike. Rising like a phoenix from the ashes of FTTW comes the latest offering from my life. And this time we are working "completely... un... fettered." No boundaries, no formats, No Limit! Boo-ya Bi-otch! A few more links, a few more tributes, and a few more pop culture references.
So hopefully this will be a cleverly humorous, somewhat intellegent, not-really pretentious, very-Fred blog. I would like to sincerely thank my friends for being patient and waiting for me to have the time to re-establish something I can be proud of.
Let's do this...
:: Freddy F. at 11:54 AM [+] ::
::
(0) comments
::
|